new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
it was like having sex with a tree stump
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize