The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
This toilet bowl is my home.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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