why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
