Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Randomize