i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
