If i could tip my vagina, i would.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
