im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I think im going to throw up on grandma
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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