wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Randomize
