So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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