Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
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