i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
