Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
