come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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