she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
