I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
