It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
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