Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
