This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Randomize
