that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
