i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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