So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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