I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
