So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
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