Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
