just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
