Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Randomize
