Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
