she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
