haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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