i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
