You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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