you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
