You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
