i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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