I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Randomize
