I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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