I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
