The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
