just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
