can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Randomize
