Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize