please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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