1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Randomize
