Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I am midnight drunk by noon
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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