Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
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