My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize