So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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