Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
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