I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
