Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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