Joe is yelling at the trees again.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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