don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
