one two three fourrrrnication!
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
