i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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